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For most of the past two days, I've been in the performing arts centre at the CCAL conference with a whole lot of friends and councillors - initially I thought that I'd probably already have gone through the courses, seminars and talks to be conducted, but it turned out to be two days of inspirational talks by Eric Feng and Martin Tan, and it really did help a lot!
You don't get to listen to good speakers talk everyday, and this was simply a good opportunity to just drop all forms and inklings of disbelief and dismissive ignorance, and listen out earnestly to what they had to offer. And I really enjoyed a good chance to re-learn what I had forgotten, and re-enforce what I had dropped. These lessons come to us in many forms all the time, and half the time we're too tired or going at a pace too fast to learn from them, so I'm glad I did manage to refresh myself on my purpose and focus in this short period of time devoid of any studying and PW (to my horror, OP is only a few weeks away!)
I seriously think I've forgotten myself too many times, sometimes. Too frequently I've allowed myself to fade into the background of acceptable standards and foundational targets, and going on this way, I'll never be as good as I really want to be. And I think it's really all too simple to be the best person I can be - to just keep at it and keep at staying as the person I am and want to be. It's not that hard, in essence. It's somewhere near. I'll keep at it :D
I remember this point about how we shouldn't limit our dreaming and we should always have big ideas, aspirations, and keep our hopes up high about every single little thing we wish to see happen, or want to make happen. Sometimes in front of us, it seems so clear that this is certainly the right thing to do, but yet we hold ourselves back a tad too often because of many reasons which we can never be able to count. I think I've been a little too wary of failure, a little too doubtful, and it's seriously wasting my time and getting on my nerves - will work at it and make sure I get somewhere!
I realize I never seem to realize some truths. I believe I'm dreaming.
Random stuff over these days:
The size 13 titus shoe versus xian's size 6 shoe hahaha!
HIOK :D Haha not bad ah we owned the world these two days!
The army of little plastic troops I was ready to deploy in a lazy game of Risk with mingzhe stanley joelynn while we waited for the awesome steamboat buffet dinner we had later on :D where boss promptly toppled every single one of them and said that they needed to sleep and they shouldn't be standing up hahah.
Sudden realization: This is a 600th post, wow.
Okay o'comm meeting tomorrow and council outing woohoo!
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